The coup to make your children willing to give you the old age:three not excessive
Thinking about the issue of elderly care is the most People can do things, especially those over half a hundred years old.
After more than half of our life has passed, we finally ushered in our old age. As we enter our old age, we have been looking forward to this day for too long, because we can finally no longer have to get up early to work, and no longer have to work hard to support our family.
Many people imagine the old age life should be like this:we sit on the bench with gray hair, basking in the sun leisurely, watching the grandchildren next to us Have fun, chat with people of the same age, or go out for a square dance. When it’s time to eat, children will come and call us home. When we were sick, our children were waiting in front of the bed to take care of us, and we lived a life of sweethearts and grandchildren.
However, many people’s old age lives are actually like this:a gray-haired old man sits at the door with no one to accompany him, at most There is a pet by his side. No one talked to the old man, and no one talked to him. When it was time to eat, no one would cook for him, and the old man had to go home by himself and prepare lunch for himself with his trembling hands. After being sick, the people guarding us may be wives, nurses, or nursing homes. As for the children, it’s not bad to visit every few days. Our biggest expectation every day is that the phone rang, and when the phone was connected, the greetings of children and grandchildren came into our ears.
It is the wish of many parents to live with their children and be cared for by their children. However, it is very difficult to realize this wish.
Parents cannot live with their children for many reasons. It may be because of work that the children have no time to take care of their parents; it may be that the parents are not adapted to city life and cannot live with their children; it may also be that the children are unfilial and unwilling to provide for their parents. Another possibility is that the parents are unreasonable, causing their children to feel headaches, and they dare not pick them up to live with, or their lives will be greatly affected.
Parents want their children to support you willingly, and there is a coup called three not excessive.
1. Parents can’t protect their children for a lifetime, and smart parents will not spoil their children too much;
Some children are due to their living habits and three views They are not willing to live with their parents, but they will do their duty to provide for their parents, visit their parents regularly, and give them enough alimony. Such children cannot be said to be unfilial.
Compared to the children who will support their parents, it is the children who give parents the most headache to chew on the old.
Although I am an adult and I can support myself, but in order not to let myself live too hard, in order to enjoy a comfortable life, many young people have become gnawing old Family. Parents are not only unable to get financial support from their children, but instead have to spend their few pensions for their children. With such a heavy burden on their backs, their parents’ life in their old age is definitely not happy.
How did the gnaw old clan come into being? This is actually inseparable from parents. Generally speaking, the more spoiled children by their parents, the more likely they are to become gnaws.
If children are coddled by their parents, they will suffer a lot less, they will become pampered, and they will not be able to withstand social hardship. Society is not accustomed to us like our parents, it is cruel to each of us.
Therefore, if parents want to live a good life in their later years, they must first educate their children strictly, not to train their children to become talents, but also to let them be self-reliant The ability.
2,Parents are not the cash machines for their children, and smart parents will not overpay their children;
Everyone still remembers the old Yan in the TV series”An Jia” Couple?
Lao Yan and his wife are supporting actors in”An Jia”. Their experience has slapped the idea of raising children and preventing the elderly.
In order to buy a house with full money for their children, Lao Yan and his wife spent all the money they saved from selling buns. At the request of their son, Lao Yan and his wife added the name of their daughter-in-law on the real estate certificate.
After buying the wedding house, Lao Yan and his wife closed the bun shop, packed their luggage, and wanted to move to their son’s wedding house. In their view, the old life of Hanwei, grandchildren and family reunion is just in sight. However, when they knocked on the door, they actually saw in-laws. The reaction of the mother and son told them the cruel fact that living with the son was a daydream.
If old strict The couple did not buy a house for their son in full, and they still had money in their hands. Even if the son did not want them to live together, they could still be self-sufficient, instead of having to sell buns to make money for the elderly. If they have money in their hands, in order to get the money in their hands, no matter how unwilling their sons and daughter-in-laws are, they have to make superficial efforts to please their parents.
Parents should note that as a parent, you are definitely not a cash machine for your children. If you want your children to support you willingly, you have to have money. It’s not good to say, even if it is for property, he has to be polite to you. Otherwise, if you donate the property, won’t he lose more than the gain?
Furthermore, if you have money in your hand, you can at least buy some things and find a nursing home to live in. It won’t be too difficult to move.
3. The spouse of children is not our punching bag, and smart parents will not make things difficult for their children’s spouses.
In many cases, parents do not have a bad relationship with their children, but with their children’s spouses.
Some parents have different views on choosing a spouse with their children. Before their children get married, they look at their spouses as unpleasant; some parents want their spouses to take good care of their children. , Will find ways to let him do things; some parents deliberately make things difficult for their children’s spouses, just to establish their own authority.
Smart parents will understand one truth, and that is family and everything. As the spouse of your children, as the parents of your grandchildren, they are also your family. As an elder, why bother with the younger generation? Furthermore, you see that the spouses of your children are not pleasing to your eyes, aren’t you making trouble for your children? If you offend your children’s spouse and they prevent them from filial piety to you, won’t your children be in a dilemma?
If parents want their children to provide for themselves, they must follow the three no-excess principles. Smart parents will understand the relationship with their children.