The world is so big, there are always people who can’t get along with you
Someone asked me:
“I always take care and do things as comprehensively as possible, but why do some people still dislike me? What should I do to make everyone happy? Do you like it?”
You have encountered such confusion more or less, no matter how you do it, you can’t satisfy everyone.
But in fact, this is the normal way of life, and the relationship between people is about fate, that is, the magnetic field that everyone often talks about.
People with magnetic fields will attract each other not far away; people with magnetic fields repulsion, even if they are close together, once they lose their external force , Must be separated, the farther the better.
I like a paragraph very much:You go, I will not send you. You come, no matter how strong the wind and rain, I will pick you up.
The world is so big, there are always people who can’t get along with you, instead of focusing on people and things that make you unhappy, it’s better to go with people who get along If you get along well, people who can’t get along will go to the side of the road.
1 There is no reason to like someone, hate someone Also
I I used to be a very unconfident person. Although I tried my best to do my best, as long as one person denied it, I would easily doubt myself.
I remember one time, I accidentally learned that a colleague said when talking to everyone:
“I don’t like her (me) very much, I don’t like it, I just don’t like it.”
I am very concerned about this and think about it every day Rethinking countless times, what exactly did he do wrong, still tirelessly grabbing the people around to ask again and again. Not only affects mood, but also affects work.
Until a colleague older than me said a word to me:
“What do you want to ask? The gossip people can’t tell you what’s wrong with you, why do you have to prove yourself bad?”
Yeah, even if others really say the reason, we should not easily doubt ourselves, not to mention that there is no reason, and why should we care?
Lots of times, like a person, all problems are not problems; but hate a person, all problems that are not problems are problems, this It’s not anyone’s fault.
People who are hated are unhappy, mostly because they always feel that everything is justified, but the world’s largest Most things have no cause and effect.
In life, you will always meet so few people, obviously there are no fierce conflicts and no disputes of interest. But even if we can’t talk together, we can’t think of a single thing. As long as there is communication, they will be confrontational; as long as they do things, they will fight for their reasons.
This person is like a piece of sand rubbed into his eyes, and it has been on your heart.
If you evaluate objectively, you will find that this person is not so bad except for you.
So you always have to admit that not all fish live in the same sea, everyone’s vision and angle of view of the world are different, except for themselves, No one can give an accurate definition of who’s life.
When there are doubts around us, we have to reflect on the truth of what the other party said. If so, we don’t have to doubt ourselves and improve it. The doubt will naturally be in It disappears automatically after a while.
If you don’t, you don’t have to doubt yourself, there are so many people who like yourself, and your eyes don’t have to stare at those who are tired and crooked. thing. Your good life is the best counterattack to those who do nothing.
2 the world is its own and has nothing to do with others
I like a sentence very much:
“I am me, a firework with different colors.”
It sounds cool, but in real life It’s hard to do.
We are often surrounded by the outside world, always expecting, and want to be recognized and respected. What we did not realize is that the world is its own and has nothing to do with others.
I have seen such a story:
There is a young master asking for advice:
“Master, some people praise me as a genius, some people call me a fool, what do you think?”
The master replied:
“For example, a pound of rice is a bowl of rice in the eyes of the cook, and rice cake in the eyes of the baker. In the eyes of wine merchants, wine has become wine again, but the rice is still that rice. Similarly, you are still you, and how much you have depends on how you look at yourself.”
In fact, the reason why we can’t be ourselves is often because we care too much about other people’s eyes and we lose ourselves.
In a large world, everyone is an independent individual, and each has his own idea and his own life. Your own standards cannot accurately measure others, nor can others’ requirements measure you.
Jung told his apprentices before his death:
“Everyone’s response to sunlight Different, some people feel dazzling, some people feel warm, some people even avoid the sun.
There is no sign before the seed breaks the ground and germinates, it is because that time has not arrived .Always believe that everyone is their own savior.”
Every one of us is like this seed. When and how to germinate is up to you. .
Rather than what other people say, they will cater to themselves indefinitely, either to promote seedlings or to miss the best flowering period and consume their energy for no reason.
Who doesn’t say people behind, and who doesn’t.
In life, we must first be ourselves. As for those harsh voices, those who understand you don’t need too much explanation; they don’t understand you. People, not worthy of your explanation.
No matter how much criticism you hear, it’s better to live a better life. No matter how big the world is, all you have is yourself, you are the origin and the end.
3 You can’t make everyone like it
“You don’t have to bring too many people into your life. If they can’t walk into your heart, they will only crowd your life and disturb it.”
However, there are always people in life who are forced to cope with others because of fear of being excluded, but they are crowded, but there are very few real people.
In the Japanese drama”New Life of Naruto”, the protagonist Naru always likes to please others.
Work mistakes, the leader got angry, colleagues gave her a look, she immediately took the initiative to pack;
My friends took photos together, but she was the ugliest. She was embarrassed to say it, and she liked it in the social circle in time;
Boyfriends like it Straight hair lady, she wakes up early every day and spends an hour straightening the head of the explosion, transforming herself into a lady…
She thought it was just a matter of If you are pleased with the situation, you will surely be liked by everyone.
However, her boyfriend still confessed to her colleagues that her life is boring; girlfriends have a small group that they don’t know, and they despise her and look down on her.
Reality gave her a heavy blow, let her wake up suddenly, and reminded you and me in front of all TV sets:rely on satisfaction It is the greatest self-deception in life to live by the expectations of others and to entrust your life to others.
Jobs once said:
“Listen to your own voice, be yourself What I want to do. There is no right or wrong in life, but no matter what lifestyle you choose, don’t forget that pleasing yourself is the best way to live.”
No one is renminbi, it is impossible for everyone to like it, and someone who really likes you does not need you to please, someone who does not like you, no matter how catered.
It’s not terrible that someone can’t get along with you. I’m afraid that because of one or two special cases, people don’t dare to be loyal to their hearts. Live yourself.
I agree with the author Wu Qishi who wrote in”Silent Confession”:
“Our whole life is to get rid of the expectations of others and find the true self.”
4 You don’t have to bring too many people into your life
When I first started writing, I always cared about the comments below.
But the more I found out later, the reason for the different voices was that some of them were taken out of context because they didn’t read the full text, some were pricked at the painful spots, and more What they say is not the same as what I want to express.
I think life is related to writing, if there is any disagreement, it may not be who’s fault, it’s just that no matter how good an article is, there are always The limitations of the author or reader’s thinking; no matter how good one person is, he can never satisfy everyone.
In fact, many times, as long as you like you more than you hateyou You often have no big problems and don’t have to be too harsh on yourself.
Life is about getting along with people you like and enjoying it, and getting along with people you don’t like is ability.
We don’t have to invite too many people into our lives.