2021-05-03

The best family style:discuss big things, forgive small things, don’t dispute right or wrong, don’t turn over old accounts

By yqqlm yqqlm
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A home is everything to us The starting point is the direction of return.

Author:Insight May

Goethe once said this:

“Whether it is a king or a farmer, as long as the family Harmony, he is the happiest person.”

The truth is also true. A person, if the family is scattered, no matter how high the status is, no matter how much money he earns, it is difficult to feel happy.

And if the family style is harmonious, even if it happens to satisfy the food and clothing, you will feel happy.

The best style of a family is:discuss the big things, forgive the little things, don’t argue about right or wrong, and don’t turn over old accounts.

01

  • Discuss major issues and don’t make any claims.

There is an old saying among the folks:It is better to discuss with one person than two.

A truly good family relationship is never an arbitrariness of one party, but a discussion on the matter.

A very successful entrepreneur who was once invited to participate in a sharing session.

At the meeting, many people thought he would share common business knowledge.

Unexpectedly, he said something amazing and said something no one expected.

He repeatedly emphasized:”Men rushing outside must learn one sentence:I want to discuss with my wife.”

Why?

Because, now that many people do things, the most common problem is that”the soldiers and horses are not moving, the food and the grass go first.”

The matter hasn’t started yet, and the money is almost spent.

I will study here today, and have dinner there tomorrow. I want to invest in everything I see. I ran around and spent a lot of money on travel and meals, but nothing was done. .

And if you can discuss more with your wife in everything, it is equivalent to an extra pair of eyes, an extra smart brain, an extra firewall, and an extra protective umbrella, which can avoid a lot of unnecessary trouble.

No one is an island, the meaning of family existence is to warm each other.

Smart people, when encountering problems, especially when encountering major events, they will definitely discuss more with their family members.

This not only allows you to think about the problem more comprehensively.

More importantly, Behind all discussions, it means trust and respect.

When a family has discussions and mutual respect, the family’s cohesion and sense of belonging will be stronger.

A home can be crossed, the better.

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02

  • Forgiveness for small things is an armor to maintain warmth.

Someone asked on the Internet:What is the secret of a happy family?

Among them, the highest praise answer is:Don’t blame me if you are in trouble.

On Zhihu, netizens Ding Dang shared a story about her.

One afternoon, the weather was terribly gloomy, and Ding Dang received a call from her husband to remind her to close the doors and windows.

Ding Dang said happily.

But because he was in a hurry to go out, he turned his head and forgot about it.

Shortly after she left the house, the sky was stormy. The rain passed through the window, and the sofa and her husband’s computer on the sofa were soaked.

When the two returned home, they were dumbfounded when they saw the mess in the living room.

If this happens, I believe many people will blame each other.

King Dang’s husband looked at wife regretful, not only did not blame , But comforted in a low voice:

“It’s okay, it just happens that my computer is also old, so I can replace it with another one.”

Just a simple sentence, I believe, No matter what ups and downs the couple will encounter in the future, they will be able to get through together.

And those unhappy families often blame and accuse each other in daily life.

Wife blames her husband, you work so long every day, why didn’t you make a lot of money?
The husband blames his wife. Why can’t I take care of a child well? Why did he catch a cold again?
Parents blame their children, why can’t they do such simple homework? ……

Which family does not have any bumps?

If you always care about each other and blame each other, it will only intensify the war.

For trivial things, tolerate each other; forgive me for details that don’t hurt the elegant.

After all, there are few big winds and waves in life, and the warmth that melts in the firewood, rice, oil, and salt is the most moving.

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03

  • Don’t argue about right or wrong. If you win a fight, you will lose your feelings.

I especially like the story of Pingru and Meitang.

The love of two people, there is no landslide and each other, but it allows everyone who has read their stories to realize what truly warm feelings are.

Life is always trivial, and two people are not without small contradictions.

Once, as flat as Meitang quarrel, as flat as a torch The kettle fell to the ground.

Mei Tang was frightened and cried instantly.

Meitang’s tears suddenly pulled Pingru out of her anger.

He quickly stopped the argument, took Meitang’s hand, apologized, and admitted that he was wrong.

Meitang saw him lower her head, and her emotions eased.

Ask him:”I know I am wrong, why did you let me.”

Pingru said:”Because I am afraid that I will win the fight, lose my feelings, and lose you. , I lost my life.”

A quarrel was resolved in this way.

Our daily lives are mostly trivial things.

“Do you want to squeeze toothpaste from the middle or from the tail?
Daily expenses , Is it better to be frugal, or to pursue the quality of life?
After a quarrel, who should admit the mistake first?”

In life, it may be all the time There are differences. If everything is right or wrong, it will not only hurt the feelings, but also make everyone in the family physically and mentally exhausted.

There is a saying that says it well:”Home is not a reasonable place. You win reason and lose emotion.”

Know how to make concessions in time for everything, don’t always Thinking about winning or losing, as everyone in the family, learn to bow your head, and life will become more and more beautiful.

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04

  • Wounds that are always opened will never heal without turning over the old account.

The scariest thing about two people quarreling is turning over old accounts.

No matter how much we care and love each other, once we start to turn over the old accounts, all the unhappiness and grievances in the past will come out again.

Stacked on top of each other, turning small things into big things.

There is such a plot in the movie”Reunion”.

The family returns to the wife’s parents’ house.

When the child shouted someone, he accidentally called”Grandpa” as”GrandpaGrandma”.

After hearing this, the husband furiously furious at the child and said cruelly at his wife:”Grandpa is grandpa, grandpa is grandpa, I am not Invert the door!”

The wife was also flushed with anger:”Who said you were in the door?”

The husband replied:”That’s what your family has thought since the beginning of marriage!”

The old bills were overturned, and the earth turned upside down.

The husband began to complain about his wife’s family for embarrassing him. When he was young, his family was poor, but he was asked to collect enough to buy a house before marriage.

The wife also began to crusade, saying how she bent down to marry in the first place, and how her husband insulted and despised now.

All of a sudden, the child was crying, and the family jumped around.

It says in”Stable Rogue”:

“In fact, the trick for two people to stay together for a long time is not to turn over the old accounts.

What can I do if I turn it over? It’s just one that is more sad and the other more annoying.”

< p>It is true.

Turning over an old account is like opening a wound that is about to heal, and then sprinkling salt on the wound.

In the past, whoever did not have some faults will eventually turn over the old account and get revenge sooner or later.

Resolve conflicts on the spot, and then one yard into one yard, clean and neat, is the way for a parent to be stable for a long time.

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05

There is a saying that goes well:

“Home is not a battlefield. You don’t need to wave the flag and shout to see who wins or lose. Home is not a chessboard. You don’t need to be cautious and watch out everywhere.”

A home should be the starting point for all of us, the direction of our return, and our eternal safe haven.

Everyone in the family, discuss the big things, and forgive me for the small things. Don’t fight for right or wrong, don’t turn over old accounts.

In this way, a home will be more gentle and intricate, and it will be better to cross over.